IM BACK!!!! (Maybe if I could be a bit more consistent, I could try a different start to my blogs).

It has been a good month since I have even felt the drive to get on here. It just reminds me of the remnants of myself that were motivated. That weren’t overwhelmed by the workload of a full time job (starting in a brand new department) and raising two toddlers (who decide to crank up the hard mode everyday – Have you ever played Diablo? Its like on “Torment” level now!). The biggest drop in this, is, I just can’t handle the medicine. I don’t like the feeling of being on Adderall or Ritalin. I didn’t feel like myself. I felt like I was losing myself each and everyday. No one was getting the best version of me. So….I decided to find natural ways to handle my ADHD ( this makes it sound like I found them, but I haven’t…it’s a work in process). I still feel like an imposter as a wife, mother, Customer Success Manager (ya girl got a promotion!!), and just person in general. Then, I had someone tell me “You don’t have to be great at everything now. We all have seasons, and you are just in a season of your life where things are hard.” <- Not those exact words, but along those lines. It was EVERYTHING I needed to hear.

Let me stop with the serious stuff and give the audience what they really want.

ME

What?! Me?! I have been to the doctor A LOT lately (mostly because I caved and things that have been wrong for a while, my husband talked me into getting check out).

Can we all agree Doctors are a little camera crazy?! I feel like every appointment I go to now they just casually say “I’m going to stick a camera attached to a long, thick, snake like rope up/down/in you” LIKE IT IS NORMAL!!

People!? We need to unite. They can’t just do this to us. At the very least I want the respect of being told BEFORE my appointment that a camera is going inside of me.

I’m not even sure which was worse… the nasal endoscopy or the [TMI Warning] —— Anoscope.

I’m perfectly fine by the way. Apparently I just have really bad allergies that lead to chronic sore throats and birthed a baby with a large head that now leads to chronic fissures in my butt ( I may have put the TMI warning a bit too soon). NO. BIG. DEAL.

I’m done.

LILY

I have to set this girl straight so much that now she is doing it to her brother and dad.

One night, Leo was playing with something he shouldn’t have (shocker!) and I look to see Lily there with 4 fingers up going “Onnneee….twwoooo….freeee….bouurrr…..SIX! UH-UH LEO!”. I about died one because that was the first real indication that I am turning into a mom, and two what happened to five???

She is so bossy. She can beat up on her poor little brother all day, but if Leo cries because he doesn’t want his diaper changed she will yell at her dad and I to “STOP”.

LEO

Pure destruction and cuteness. That’s all that needs to be said.

When my husband and I said “How could it really be worse” when Lily was in the middle of her toddler phase, the universe decided to show us how. He gave us Toddler Leo.

He actually reminds me a lot of my youngest brother David. So charismatic and uses it to his advantage. I like to think of my self as a pretty smart individual, but he gets me every time.